HUSBAND-WIFE RELATIONSHIP AND HINDERANCES

Devotee-sister;
                         Why don't we have harmony in our relationship?

Pujya Shree Mota;
                               You should decrease the force of your opinion and insistence. Harmony between the two is not possible as long as there is a tendency to insist that work should be done in one way and not the other. So you should be careful about this. Continue to do naam-smaran at every moment.
                               With love and devotion, continue to recite God's name, at the same time reducing your insistence regarding the actions and behavior ( proper or improper ) of your husband. Allow everybody to act in their own way. It is excellent if both of you have harmony, and live by the common higher purpose in life.


Lagne hajo mangalam ( લગ્ને હજો મંગલમ )
Edition 1, page 113

HUSBAND-WIFE RELATIONSHIP

Devotee-sister ;                                                                                                                                                                                
                           Mota,  What should we do to calm the oppositional feeling between us?

Pujya Shree Mota ;
                        
                           Goodness will not express or expand in our lives without constant annihilation of narrowness of our mind and nature. We should be constantly looking for ways and making an effort to catch and destroy, the narrowness and crookedness of our mind and nature. This requires close watch and analysis of our nature and mind.
                          No body is our enemy or worth taking revenge in this life. It is entirely appropriate for us, if this kind of feeling does not arise in our mind towards any soul. You should behave in such a way, so that the life becomes peaceful and smooth. You should not give any reason, for him to agitate or point a finger at you even in the future.
                         Continue to work on your strong opinions and recite God's name as much as possible, otherwise two wheels of the car will not work in harmony, and create trouble for you. When you accept the meeting of two souls, then definitely learn to harmonize and understand the true meaning of harmony.


Lagne hajo mangalam ( લગ્ને હજો મંગલમ )
Edition 1; page 112.



My two cents ---
                      Even though this is addressed to wife in her relationship with her husband, opposite is also equally true. I think this is true in any relationship.

Ashwin                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                          

HAPPINESS, ITS DISCOVERY AND IGNORANCE

March 6, 1940
Karachi.


Dear Sister,

You have mentioned attachment and its illusion in your letter. The mind wants to be happy and so it engages in these kind of activities. Knowingly or unknowingly, all of our activities are in search of happiness. But we have not understood true happiness since we fail to distinguish and differentiate between momentary and permanent happiness. Even in worldly affairs, we leave the people that are not useful and go after the people that are beneficial to us. We see distinct advantage in doing so. Similarly we get dragged into our infatuations with worldly life and pleasures. It should be apparent to us the momentary nature of this happiness, as it is short lived. The mind, in turn, tries to find another area of happiness and keeps hopping around from one pleasure to another all the time. It does not find permanent happiness in any one particular item, thought or satisfying any of the desires. At the same time, to find permanent happiness is in the nature of human mind and there has to be a state of mind where it is achievable. Momentary happiness is no way near permanent happiness. If we have heartfelt understanding of this fact and have experienced the momentary nature of this happiness ( because worldly pleasures are momentary and you have to keep hopping from one pleasure to another constantly to maintain the pleasure ) then you can have some inclination to find true and permanent happiness.

You will understand all this, when you will have inclination and appetite to get this true and permanent happiness. One gets this inclination and inspiration at one glorious moment in life, but one either misses the moment or gets entangled into surroundings and its effects, thus effectively killing the moment. We continually go after the mirage of momentary happiness with our eyes closed.

Pujya Shree Mota
Jivan pagaran ( જીવન પગરણ )
Edition 3; page 61-62

REACHING LIFE'S GOALS WITH DEVOTION INFUSED WITH KNOWLEDGE

Experiences of higher consciousness happen, but these experiences have different meaning and understanding depending upon the level of one's development. In turn, these experiences act as a guide and help us to reach a higher level of consciousness. These experiences have value, only if this happens. The mind develops unshakable faith, only when one is convinced in the heart. One cannot enter this path with imagination or dry knowledge. One needs devotion infused with knowledge to enter this path. Deeper, practical and subtle yet forceful understanding of life is revealed with this kind of devotion. One recognizes the nature and disposition of relatives that comes in one's contact. It is very important for us to see that we don't get dumbfounded, get entangled into or develop attachment and jealousy towards these relatives. We should instantly decide if this thought, feeling and inclination of our mind is a facilitator towards reaching our goal in life. If not, then it should be removed from our mind with sternness and love. We should also draw the attention of our mind to it's smallness and worthlessness and in the process elevate our mind to higher level. This should be done with love.

Pujya Shree Mota

Jivan mandan ( જીવન મંડાણ )
Edition 3; page 39