Devotee ; I cannot stop the passion and natural tendencies ( vrutti, વૃિ-ત ) that floods my mind. I do become aware of it, but only after the fact. Is this considered a progress?
Pujya Shree Mota ; We should be keenly aware of our own nature and accordingly we must have awareness that all our works are neither guided nor the slave of our nature. You can not have true life without this live awareness. It is entirely possible that novice sadhak may not be able to stop the flooding of these vrutti of his nature. Yet if he is aware of this flooding at that instant, then he may be able to use this for good purpose, if and when it happens again. One will not progress without this instantaneous awareness. Awareness after the fact is very inappropriate for sadhak. He must have awareness right at the moment.
You must pay attention to, the example of an alcoholic realizing his bad behavior under the influence, after becoming sober. Your condition will exactly be like that. If you experience deep, profound and forceful regret after the fact, then it may be appropriate. But it is not appropriate for sadhak, if this awareness comes after the incident, each and every time. If the degree awareness increases, only then it can be concluded, that it is handled with some understanding. Earlier one was aware after the force of nature was spent, now one is aware at that very instant.
Pujya Shree Mota
Dhan no yog ( ધનનો યોગ )
Edition 1 ; page 134
PUJYA SHREE MOTA
